5 of the Best Ways to Lose a Debate Against Evolution

IF you really want to start a bad argument, and take it from the direction of someone that thinks evolution is hogwash, there are many, many terrible arguments you can make. IF you genuinely don’t think evolution is real, even better, you will be much more convincing since you actually think what you are saying makes sense. OF course on the internet to get into such a debate is probably going to be very difficult for you since the internet has a much higher concentration of people that accept evolution as a fact, as well as a much higher concentration of people that think religion is hogwash. This makes it a big challenge for you to win an argument on it since people are much more familiar with the concepts of evolution these days and your pure BS won’t convince many. Now…if you are just trolling…that’s another matter. Stupid arguments work perfectly fine because it still does the job a troll wants to do. Piss other people off and make them mad at you. Especially something like this that they have at least a vague understanding of and therefore MUST explain it to you correctly to show that they are smart.

Let’s see here. We’ll start with some of the most absurd you shouldn’t use. Ones that are used as jokes by most that accept evolution when discussing it and making fun of those that don’t understand it.

1. If we evolved from Monkeys why are there still monkeys!? Huh!?

When this is thrown out there you know it is time to leave. Absolutely no one should bother even arguning with you on this point. IT’s so absurd and shows such lack of understanding in this one phrase that there is no hope for you. Absolutely none. If this notion occurs to you at all you are utterly hopeless in understanding evolution. This is a half assed attempt at trolling and simply not gonna be taken seriously. Read this to learn why there are still monkeys.

2. Evolution is just a Theory

Had to add this one because it is just as bad as the first one. It’s a very common idea put forth in any debate about science from dullards. So much so that I’ve seen people consider changing the term “theory” to appease these utter buffoons and make sure they can’t take it the wrong way. Read this to understand “What is a theory?”

3. Evolution can’t explain the origins of life

No kidding. It has nothing to do with explaining the origins of life and has nothing to do with the BIG BANG. Using the two together is actually pretty common when talking to people that have a need for ab intelligent designer, and a creator. Many times people will try to shoehorn the origin of life into the evolution argument when they don’t understand it. This is why so many religious people ahve such a hard time accepting it. They think it means everything came from nothing and random chance. The old “tornado through a junkyard” motto, or even something as silly as “lightning striking a mud puddle” come from this idea. These are people that failed to even take 10 seconds to type this into Google “What is evolution?” (I did it for you) Just spend 15 minutes reading any of those pages and you will have at least some idea about it that you can pretend to understand it.

4. “Survival of the fittest” can’t possibly be true because weak still survive.

This notion of “Survival of the fittest” is something that is more of a catch phrase that makes people think evolution is a path straight to the realms of Hitler’s secret research labs. In turn makes people think that evolution leads to “eugenics” and tampering with the natural order. As the link above suggests it was used as an alternative to “Natural selection” (also explained int he link above).

First of all, “Fittest” doesn’t mean “strongest”. It could mean any number of things, but think of it as better adapted for their environment. For instance, elephants in Africa have been hunted for their ivory by poachers forever. In a very short time frame it has actually been observed that these elephants have started to evolve SHORTER tusks, which in turn makes them a less desirable target for poachers. A very strange and interesting adaption, but defintiely not something that you would consider pushing towards the “Strongest” argument. On the other hand it is likley that those with larger tusks were considered better for breedign by the females as well so it is a very interesting adaption to say the least.

5. The Second Law of Thermodynamics

This has become increasingly popular for some reason to throw out there. Sounds impressive just to state it and define it when in a debate apparently. Well…when stated like creationists like to state it and then try to disregard what it actually means. Like this guy (coincidentally he has a few great losing arguments as well you should look at and it lead me to another list that does a job of refuting his 4 claims quite well here.):

This law (note: not a theory but a law) teaches us that in every chemical or heat reaction, there is a loss of energy that never again is available for another heat reaction. This is why things break down if left to themselves, and why scientists tell us that the universe is headed toward a heat death.

This law teaches us, then, that the universe is headed toward increasing randomness and decay.

But what does the theory of evolution teach us? The exact opposite, that the universe is headed toward increasing complexity and order. You put up a theory against my law, I’m going to settle for the law, thank you very much.

Sounds impressive right? Wrong. This definition is not accurate. Misinterpreted. Very common for it to spread through creationist scribblings in a form similar to this and the more it spreads the more it helps spread not just confusion, but false information. A MAJOR theme in the lack of understanding of evolution I might add. The Religion vs. Science fight takes a lot of liberties in twisting definitions for their purposes.

Since I found a good counter-point to this exact claim already here I won’t go on about it. You can jsut read that gentleman’s perfectly fine answer there and the other 3 he disputes from the original article.

So…while these arguments are definitely troll worthy for various levels, they all will ultimately be poor ones if you want to look good. For straight trolling…well the top ones are for the most absurd venture where you are one that probably hits himself repeatedly with a reel hose for fun, and the others will probably at least make people argue and philosophize about the “theory” of evolution a bit.

Who hates golfers?

You can always find someone on the internet that has the same views as you do. For many, the idea of being a non-golfer is just a dream. They struggle with their dislike of golf everyday, yet are too afraid to come out and just tell the world that “I am a non-golgfer!”.

Now you can have the support you need. Join other non-golfers and feel like you aren’t alone. Use your cloud backup software on Steam and quit your pretend interest in golf games now.


One of the most absurd responses you will see online has to be when someone calls a group of people “Sheeple”. Never is the one saying it someone that has any sort of actual knowledge about anything. Their entire existence in the conversation is to pretend they opened their eyes, man.

Anytime someone says “Sheeple” you can immediately assume that they are in fact an idiot. You believe terrorists actually perpetrated 9/11? Preposterous to those that “really know what happened”. You are nothing but a sheep. Aliens aren’t among us you say? You are a goddamn sheep. Shadow government isn’t running the entire world? A few men in a smokey room aren’t pulling all the strings? Only sheeple believe such nonsense.

These are the type of people that think just coming up with some insane theory is actually fact. They have never heard of, or attempt to use the scientific method to prove anything. Their “evidence” is psychedelic philosophy based on being highly depressed, or simply nuts. They are these people. The worst part is that they consider themselves “skeptics”, although they never actually do any of the research that a skeptic is supposed to do. Mired in depression usually, they fantasize about being watched by the government because they “know something”. Unemployed morons are the key to toppling the Bilderberg Group folks. Armed with nothing but an internet connection and a forum where they talk to other conspiracy nuts they call YOU a sheep for actually checking up on their claims. Have evidence that contradicts theirs? Shut up sheep.

CoastToCoastAM: Where Crazy Happens

You may have actually heard of this show. If I am not mistaken it is the most listened to AM talk show at night in the world. I’m not looking this up of course, but I assume it is since every single night you can find it on about 2/3 of the AM stations flipping through the dial.

Funny thing is that I find this stuff entertaining, but probably not i the way it is intended. This show covers all the nutjob topics. 9/11 conspiracies, NWO, Illuminati, FAKE moon landing, aliens, ghosts, demons, chemtrails, global warming conspiracy, and I could go on and on. If you can think of something nutjobs blindly believe while not looking for any real evidence at all this is the show.

I once joined the website so I could get streaming archives of the show since they actually had some real science stuff on for a while that I wanted to hear. This allowed me access to some private message board for other subscribers of the show. Let’s just say that depression, and schizophrenia were the most common characteristics of the people posting there. Having custom name plates with something like “Truth Seeker” isn’t uncommon when in reality they don’t look for the truth at all.

IF you have never thought about the type of people that truly believe this nonsense you may not really know what I mean. You have to be a certain kind of person to believe this stuff, but more importantly you have to have some other mental issues that drives you to want to believe it. It may not be the exact same as religious following,b ut it certainly shares some of the characteristics. Much more the dark ones, however since religion can actually be a “happy” thing for many people. Wanting these whacko conspiracies to be true and to believe them without any evidence tends to comes with some sort of depression, or extreme anger issues. These people are VERY hard to troll actually now that I think of it since they literally believe everything.

You know you have met someone that is into this stuff seriously when arguments in a debate consist of phrases such as these:

1. “Open your eyes!”
2. “Wake up, man!”
3. “They don’t want you to know!”

and many of the same ilk you know that the person you are debating with has no concept of what a debate actually is, nor that you need to provide evidence when you make a claim. Evidence that can be tested and proved to be claimed as “Facts” like many nutjobs like to do. It’s the same as arguing about religious stories and existence obviously.

Anyways, this is a long-winded post that will end with me linking you to a Youtube channel which has years of the show archived here and to KFI.com which plays the show every night and is available online rather than an actual radio. This is so you can either become the crazy, or laugh at it.

America Deserves to be Trolled Apparently

Spending any amount of time on major websites like Youtube, IMDb.com, Twitter, etc. you come to realize one major theme. Everyone hates the United States of America if they aren’t from there.

It is most apparent when you see some ridiculous and crazy crime. A stupid person getting caught and the story of the cover up being so pathetic that it will always get a “Stupid Americans”, or “Typical American idiot” reaction from some posters.

The best thing about this though is that they pretend that words like “typical” and pluralizing the word as “Americans” doesn’t REALLY mean MOST Americans when called out on it. They backtrack and say something moronic, but if they have any intelligence will still get a few digs in during their clearing it up. IF they can’t handle being questioned they will just start calling all Americans fat, and that we kill babies. ALL of us.

Another thing that really annoys people living outside AMERICA is that we call it AMERICA. Many a times I see a huffy response directed at someone who does like “you think you are the only America in the world?” like they didn’t just call all Americans stupid, or fat.

Of course eventually they will claim that they have been to America and liked it, but they still can’t comprehend the difference between comparing what is on he news and what they observed. So you are left with the fact that they are liars, and tell them to go away, or continue on with the meaningless argument. pool lifts

It’s an odd form of trolling I guess, but it is so prevalent that it is almost considered a cultural thing for the World vs. USA. They want to destroy their sports teams in sports Americans don’t even care about. A sport called soccer in America and football everywhere else. They call our football American Football and say it sucks no matter what even though it is one of the most watched sports around the world.

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